They say that revenge usually isn't as fulfilling as it seems, but over the years, people have found a way to enjoy getting their petty on. All they had to do was lower the stakes as much as possible.
The tales of revenge we'll be hearing today aren't grand and life-changing and that's exactly what makes them work.
Besides, the smaller the revenge, the harder it is to get found out.
As long as the dad isn't really good with Photoshop, he won't be able to make himself look good with this one.
Somehow, my mom gets this problem in person. You'd think Maria would be a hard name to get wrong but she keeps getting "Marie" and "Marcia."
Looks like her idea to pretend they weren't there only made her stuff actually disappear. Doesn't really seem worth it, huh?
Nothing beats that feeling when those who wrong you only end up making themselves miserable without you doing anything at all.
Bonus points if you can even say you tried to prevent it.
Kids going through doggy doors, shocking betrayals, and the senseless destruction of innocent, musical toothbrushes? When will the carnage end?
Well, I assume it ended years ago — unless she's still watching her toothbrush like a hawk.
Although the fact that the company those guys just finished dissing suddenly won't stop pestering them with dynamo deals should have been a clue.
But I suppose that all depends on what's stronger, their thirst — or their thirst for revenge. Watching them sadly dump out their bag would be worth feeling parched.
Unless you really like getting spiteful recommendations, forgetting this step can make things suck pretty hard pretty quickly.
That said, I don't think I'd be able to look at a bottle of glitter without shivering for months if this happened to me.
Getting bugged like crazy about goats you don't have would be bad enough without the part where you only have a 50/50 shot of understanding the callers.
I wouldn't recommend following this person's example because there's no telling what a man is capable of when he's deprived of sleep due to midnight fridge calls.
I mean, getting him to blame the TV for this pettiness was pretty slick. Bonus points for also getting the TV for the rest of the night.
There's nothing like realizing somebody just made a lot of money by dissing you to really make the taste of defeat set in.
And that taste is about as unsatisfying as their burgers. Hey-oh!
I guess they're not just fumbling through the dark in the bathroom, but also through the game of life. It really makes you think.
I'd like to think that whoever put this up got mad at first but then had to weigh the pros and cons for a while.
Even before they let it age for a week (which makes me shudder), I'd already hate this because it's probably among my least favorite smells.
Either she's a genius for convincing this dude to walk into such an obvious trap or we're not gonna see a lot of Nobel Prizes in this guy's future.
I love that this man went with "coward," like the trials and tribulations of hardcore bingo were just too tough for their grandchild and they wimped out.
Like, what did they do when they were grounded for staying out after curfew? Grab the raw chicken and wait for their moment?
If nothing else, this should go a long way towards speeding up the divorce proceedings. So his lawyer will be happy even though he isn't.
And in this case, totally grossing out the parents has the added bonus of plausible deniability. After all, we know this wasn't some unfortunate accident, but they don't.
Well, at least until all five of these people blow up this dude's phone demanding to know why he doesn't like them.
Them's the breaks, I guess.
'Cause if this guy thinks he's too good for one of the world's most romantic and lyrical languages, I think he deserved what he got here.
I feel like she should have said some kind of one-liner before she walked away, but I also can't think of anything that's both clever and relevant.
