As a self-identifying square peg that is constantly trying to jam itself into round holes, I understand the frustration of not fitting in. Trying to determine the appropriate balance between what you want to be doing and what you should be doing is about as easy as taking candy from a full-grown baby — an adult, if you will: It's stealing, it's difficult, and it's wrong.
Anyway, in celebration of being a bit weird, here are some pictures that represent the struggle.
One of these things is not like the other, one of these things just doesn't belong. Or does it? Some would argue that Hamburger Helper isn't a flower. I would say that it's a thing of beauty, regardless.
And thank God for that, because as you'll learn scrolling through this article, I am literally never right. I think at one point I refer to Pop-Tarts as the second coming of Christ, if that's any indication of what you're in for.
Cheetos Rule Everything Around Me — get the munchies! Cheesy, cheesy snacks, y'all!
Your parents must be so proud; I know that I would be if this were my kid. Unlike my parents, whose kid just made a Wu-Tang reference involving snack food.
This is as extra as it gets. The staff at Hobby Lobby don't get paid enough to deal with your snap obsession and you're going to piss off quite a few scrapbookers if you're not careful. Don't try this at home.
I really have no reason to believe that would happen, but I also have no idea how this fish got put in there, so who knows?
Everybody knows that sandwiches are privy to losing their crispness, so it's important to make sure you close the bag tightly each time. Wait. That's not right, is it...?
I was gonna make a funny pizza pun for this, but there isn't even a real reason to do that. Plastic doesn't go on pizza, this isn't a secret. Quite frankly, looking at this is really upsetting and I need a minute.
Yeah, I know, they're good for the ecosystem or something and eat mosquitoes, and most of them won't actually hurt you. I don't care, tell that to my nightmares.
Probably wouldn't even have pickles, either.
It would suck, is what I'm trying to say. It would be a bad burger.
The bad news is that you're drenched. The good news is that this photo series is probably gonna get more of a response than any you would've taken without the water.
You know what you can go into? HELL, FOR THIS BLASPHEMY. It's nice to see the young breakfast god, Pop-Tarts, smiting your account, too.
Is that what she's buying? That's usually what I purchase when I go to the convenience store. What a nice afternoon. Sure will be refreshing after all that cocaine.
I don't think you're gonna get the kind of juice you need from these carrots, but I'm not a vegetable scientist, so what do I know?
This is one of those beautiful, admirable things that can only happen a small handful of times before it's played out and everybody knows what you're trying to pull.
With a weapon of mass destruction taped to their bumper, they're lucky if they even make it out of the driveway.
The NERVE of the rapscallions in the neighborhood! How dare they?!
Oh, just me? Well, excuse me for being honest with everyone. Get your judgment outta here.
I'm not really sure why you'd wanna live somewhere where literally everything is trying to kill you, but that's coming from someone who lives where the air hurts your face 50% of the time, so what do I know?
One summer, I worked in a public park scooping ice cream. Everything was well and good until the day I found dozens of tiny spiders living inside the straws that I gave to customers with their milkshakes. I have lived in fear ever since.
Seriously, this thing needs a trip through the car wash immediately. I don't even wanna imagine what those panties smell like. Probably exhaust.
This makes it so much easier! I see big things in this person's future. I also see zseebc pxDomrla ophCcpP erygxo.
Actually, I'm lying. I don't want to change, that sounds awful. I want money, but apparently people are more inclined to cram it into dead foliage than give it to me.
Is this the kind of situation where you can separate them and they'll go on to live long, happy, booty-cleaning lives?
And if there's a strawberry growing in the middle of it for some reason, then dexterity is dodging the weird strawmato when I throw it across the room because I have no idea WTF to do with it.
